Why the illness? Why exactly me?

When the life answers you your questions.

Why am I always sick? Why is some illness annoy me my whole life? I always have to fight something and I can never win over it. Why is the life hurting me like this? Why exactly me? Answer me, please. And be honest to me.

Do you really wanna hear the truth? Are you ready for it?

Yes. I have had enough of suffering!

Okay. I, as a life, know everything. I know your subconscious thoughts and trust me you can’t fool me. You have to know that you don’t experience anything you haven’t chosen yourself. Really anything!

What? Are you trying to tell me that I have chosen the suffering? I would never have chosen it!

I understand you are surprised. You are not the first one to react this way. Yes! You yourself have chosen it. Let’s look into your inside. You subconsciously long for an attention from people. It feels good when someone has to take care of you and when someone worries about you. That’s when you really feel alive. From outside you look very tired but you really enjoy it from inside. You know well that when you get sick you get as much attention as you want!

Subconsciously you don’t wanna get well because that would mean to have nobody to take care of you and that is unacceptable for you!

I would like to defend from these words. But somewhere deep there I feel it is true. I am ashamed.

Of course. As soon as you sink inside of yourself you always feel the truth. And the thing that you admit it means you can finally cure. My goal is not to put the shame on you but to tell you the truth.

Am I going to cure just like that? What exactly do I have to do?

I know that you don’t really know who you are and that’s why I will try to explain it a little. Are you familiar with these three words: body, mind, spirit? Or father, son and holy spirit? We have given them different forms. You have to know that this trinity is basically one unit and everything is connected together. A body reacts to a mind. A mind reacts to a body. And a spirit just silently observes and does not get involved into anything. But that is not the answer to your question. I just needed to explain it.

So I think I understand. And now, what is my answer?

Do you remember how often have you been having the thoughts that your life and job does not interest you anymore? That you can’t do it anymore and you have no power to keep living? And mainly when you have been stating you are worth nothing and you are a pile of unfortunate? That you have been only making mistakes in your life? Do you remember that?

Of course. I just described the reality. It is really that way!

Do you see? And here is the answer for your initial question. This is exactly why you are sick! And that’s why the life is only suffering for you! Your mind has affected your body. Do you understand already?

So how do I cure? How do I take responsibility for my life?

It is enough to realize your thoughts. You can never expect anything else if you do the same things. Change the way you think. Realize who you are not and stop identifying yourself with thoughts you don’t wanna have. It is that simple. You would forget the first third of what you are. A spirit! And what does a spirit do? It observes in silence and does not get involved into anything. Try to pay attention to this part of you and not to mind. You will see what will happen.